Woof.

Recently, I've acquired a sweet onery little dog named Max. Max is very cute and cuddly, but tends to be over-excited about life and I decided he needed to learn how to be a good citizen. Jumping on people is rude.

So, we signed up for dog training class. Friends, this is a whole other world I was not aware of. Unbeknownst to me, there was entire dog subculture teaming under the surface of our day to day lives. Suddenly, Max and I were thrown into an environment of competitive collar and leash combinations, snide comments about the size of particular dogs, and, tears, yes, tears, at the thought of telling the dog no.

In the last three weeks, Max has learned to sit (most of the time), walk on a leash without pulling (when he wants to), and that the spray bottle is bad. I have learned how to "speak dog owner," the subtle, but significant difference between big dog people and small dog people, and, most disgustingly, which brand of plastic bag is best for picking up poop.

How far we've come.